It's true, what they say... old habits do die hard. They're hard to break. Maybe you can hold back for a while, but usually those habits will come slithering right back. Then there you are, right back where your sorry bad habit having ass began.
Maybe, one who could actually stop being in denial, and honest with themself could leave the old habits behind. That all starts with telling the truth. One may lie to keep their lives in tact. Of course you would think that after so many times of that plan failing one would learn their lesson. I thought maybe someone had. Then there it is, right before my eyes. The lies, the denial.
Maybe I'm not much better. I'm with holding what I know, in an effort to keep things from shattering again. Not for my own sake. I'm sure a lot of people, my family in particular may think I'm selfish. Trust me, I'm not. I've let many a lie go too keep others from being hurt. Although with holding may eventually do that in time anyway. It shouldn't be my place to begin with.
I know the entry is quite vague, as if it were some sort of cryptic message. It is vague, but not a cryptic message. Just me rambling, trying to sort through my thoughts. It's not really working.
I will continue to with hold what is bothering me so. In time, without my speaking up, it will all come out. I just hope I'm near a table so I can duck and cover.
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